I tried the Starbucks’ unicorn frappucino the other day. I first heard rumors of it about a week ago but I wasn’t sure if the rumors were true or if they were as mythical as a unicorn. When I found out that a unicorn frappucino really was coming I was excited. When I posted about it I was told that it was cancer and diabetes through a straw. That wasn’t going to deter me from trying it though because pretty much every food ingredient out there has been linked to cancer by someone at some point and most of those links have not been definitively proven.
I also heard that the unicorn frappucino has as much sugar as three Snickers bars. That wasn’t going to deter me either because eating three Snickers bars in one day would not be entirely out of the realm of possibility for me. Oh, who am I kidding-if I got a package of Snickers it’s more likely than not that by the end of the day I would have eaten at least three of them. One day last month I ate three ice cream sandwiches ( I regretted that not just because it gave me a stomach ache but because it made me unable to eat the much better ice cream at Marble Slab that night.) I won’t even tell you how many bite sized Snickers I can consume in a day around Halloween time.
My gluttony aside, I do find all the pearl clutching over the unicorn frap’s high sugar content to be over the top. First of all, it’s only available for a few days so no one will be consuming it on a regular basis. There are other drinks with similar amounts of sugar that a lot of people do consume on a regular basis. Second of all, I think anyone can tell from looking at the drink that it contains a lot of sugar and that it’s not very healthy. It’s not as if Starbucks is touting the drink as a good source of essential nutrients and claiming that four out of five doctors recommend it. Finally, let us not forget that consumption of the unicorn frap is 100% voluntary. The drink is not being forced down anyone’s throat and toxic unicorn sludge is not leaking from anyone’s faucet.
So it was with great anticipation and enthusiasm that I went to Starbucks on April 19th, the day the unicorn frappucino was slated to arrive. When my mom inquired about it the barista said she’d tried it and it tasted like Warheads. “Warthogs?” my mom asked. “Warheads!” I corrected as I rolled my eyes.
The barista said she thought I might like it (I’m a regular at Starbucks and I’m known to have a sweet tooth.) When my drink arrived my mother remarked on how pretty it was and told me to take a picture. As if I needed to be told! I took multiple pictures of the drink and I took multiple selfies with the drink. Then I uploaded those pictures on to multiple social media accounts.
Finally I started drinking it. What did it taste like? That depended on the sip I was taking. Sometimes it was fruity, sometimes it was sweet and sometimes it was sour. I likened the taste to Sour Patch kids and the sourness did come in patches. I also compared it to inhaling a Pixie Stick and then licking a lemon. It certainly wasn’t one of the best things I’ve ever tasted but it wasn’t bad. I liked it well enough.
As I was drinking it I checked Facebook and I noticed that I was getting a lot of likes and comments on my pictures of it. It wasn’t long before my number of likes reached the double digits and it became one of my most liked posts of all time. People complimented me on my cute Unicorn Frappucino selfies and they were eager to know more about this magical drink.
About half an hour after I consumed my drink, I got a stomach ache. It was a pretty bad one and it lasted for hours. I ended up having to take medicine for it. But do I regret drinking the unicorn frappucino? Nope, not at all. I’m grateful for the experience. I’m glad to have been part of a sensation that lit up social media and the world with its bright, sparkly colors for a brief period of time.
I would have felt left out if I hadn’t participated in it. Trying (and photographing) a drink that’s based on a creature that’s all about being unique and different from everyone else became all about jumping on the bandwagon and doing what your friends were doing. I’m not sure that reflects too well on me or the society I live in but there you have it.
When I went to Starbucks today, I noticed that the unicorn frappucinos were all sold out. Not that I would have had another one anyway. Once was enough. If I had another one I have a feeling my stomach would file for divorce. It also seems appropriate to let my sampling of the unicorn frappucino be a unique once in a lifetime experience.