I can see from the stats on my blog that I have some cyber stalkers so I decided to devote a blog post to cyber stalking, that creepy little habit we all engage in but all like to pretend we don’t engage in.

Let me be clear that I’m using the term cyber stalking loosely here. I am not using the technical definition of cyber stalking which is to use the internet to threaten or harass someone. That is bad behavior that I do not condone. I’m talking about using the internet to look up information about people.

When someone cyber stalks us or our friends we are horrified and conveniently forget all the times we’ve cyber stalked other people. I’m sure that the prevalence of cyber stalking is the reason Facebook will not tell you who has been viewing your profile. A feature that allows you to track who has been looking at your profile sounds great until you realize that it would work both ways.  You’d see all the creeps who had been viewing your profile but then other people would realize what a creep you were when they saw that you’d been viewing their profile. If cyber stalking could be tracked Facebook would get a lot less traffic.

Like pretty much everyone on this planet who has internet access I have engaged in cyber stalking and I have been cyber stalked myself. It’s scary how easy it is to cyber stalk most people. Sometimes you don’t even need to know their real name to figure out their age, address and phone number as well as the names, ages, addresses and phone numbers of several of their relatives. Of course the internet gets those details wrong sometimes. There’s a site that thinks I’m 48 years old for some reason.

I was upset when I heard people had been digging up the obituaries of my family members, one of whom died tragically at a young age to try to prove that I’d been lying about my life. However, I was glad that their cyber stalking proved that I’d been truthful. There are some accusations that can’t really be proved or disproved by cyber stalking though. Some people thought I was lying about how mean a certain relative of mine is to me. You won’t find any evidence of this person’s cruelty on the internet. What you can find about him suggests that he’s a great guy.

Yet sometimes cyber stalking can give you insights in to a person’s character. Years ago I had a really mean therapist. When I was going through the worst crisis of my life she tried to convince my mother to kick me out of the house. She said that she was indifferent to what happened to me before pointing out that I needed to get a life but she already had a life. I recently cyber stalked her. I came across a profile for her at a counseling center website.Her profile said she raised and trained dogs and horses and that she used animal assisted therapy. Her picture showed her smiling as she held a puppy and sat next to an adult dog. I thought to myself “Okay, she’s cruel to humans but at least she’s kind to animals.”

Then I stalked her on Facebook. That led me to discover that she’s a cold, uncaring bitch to all creatures great and small. She made a post saying that she had a dog that was almost six years old that she’d had since it was a puppy. This dog was great with both adults and children but was aggressive to other animals. It had recently attacked another dog that she owned. She said she was hoping to rehome this dog or else she was going to euthanize her. Her post got many replies from people who were interested in finding the dog a new home. Two days later someone posted to say that this ex-therapist of mine had euthanized her dog.

I had my dog Dakota for about 6 years and as you know from a previous blog post I was devastated when she died. I can not imagine killing a pet of mine that I’d had for six years and that was great with people because she attacked another dog once.  I can not imagine not being willing to put forth the effort to try for more than two days to find my pet a new home or to to at least bring her to a shelter. I’m thinking the only reason she made that Facebook post was to mess with peoples’ emotions.

It’s scary that someone like that is a therapist. In the profile picture on the counseling center website she appears to be pictured with the dog that she euthanized. She says that she enjoys helping people work through their issues and helping them be transformed from a victim to a survivor. It’s too bad her dog had to be a victim rather than a survivor because she had to kill her rather than help her work through her problems. People need to be careful about what they post on the internet because if I was an employer and came across that Facebook post of hers I would have some serious reservations about hiring that person as a therapist.

The people who cyber stalked me were not able to find any evidence that I was lying but sometimes when you cyber stalk people you do find evidence that they’ve been lying. Those same people who accused me and a friend of mine of lying and who cyber stalked us to try to find evidence of our lying condemned us as creeps and troublemakers when we did the same thing to someone else. That just proves my original point about cyber stalking.



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